Jesus is completing His work in you.
Do not worry about closed doors when Your God is the maker of doors.
Your setback is what caused your come back. People may not see it it. Unhappy people will always be unhappy with your joy. There are things in you which somehow irritates the demons in them. When people pile up the guilt, the shame, the accusations – saying you don’t deserve it – say thank you people, for the reminder, no I don’t, but how good is God that HE thinks I am worthy.
JESUS will never leave you behind. As blind Bartimaeus called upon Him, Jesus stopped, stopping the whole crowd as well. Jesus would stop the whole world that was leaving you behind, to lift you up from your lowly position. Thank You, JESUS for dying for me.
God didn’t ask you to deserve it but to believe and receive it. And to live a life honouring and glorifying Him.
GOD delights in you. Nothing else matters. What God says matters. That is what matters the most.
If you won’t bother about it at eighty, let it go right now.